Aussies won!

First of all sorry, sorry for not blogging for a week.(because i am having a dial-up and my dear phone had died)
Whatever also my alternatives for choosing between cricket and other stuff are over
as cricketifying my blog comes to an end,
with the conclusion of world cup,
with the Australian win against Sri Lanka in a rain washed final the Aussies have a wc hat trick.
And they have proved once again they are the best...
seems that they have registered for world cup victories...l
ike i registered for the google's cricket contest...and coud not get even a penny for such useless posts.

Sennet

It was last Friday morning. Year 11 pupils (aged 15/16) were sitting in the main school hall. I was at the side of the hall next to my form group. I was ticking them off on the register while also giving out a sheaf of letters - bending over my bag which was on a plastic chair in front of me.

At the front the dippy deputy head woman with her Wurzel Gummidge hairstyle was talking self-indulgently about her recent trip to the Somme battlefield in northern France. She had taken pictures of the graveyard where Sheffield lads were buried - after dying for what? - probably nothing.

It was at the most moving point in her talk - as she held up a laminated photo of the Sheffield memorial stone in a wooded glade - that I let out a triumphant fart - or as Shakespeare might have written - a "sennet" blast. This fart was in the key of C major and it was, I swear, totally involuntary. It seemed to resound around the cavernous school hall.

Near to me, the terrible twosome - Sara and Keeley, understood immediately what had happened and who was responsible and so did the Year 11 nancy boy to my right. All three of them started to giggle as I pursed my lips and looked nonchalantly up at the ceiling.

Haystack Hair at the front interrupted her spiel to declare that in no other year group had pupils giggled during her assembly and if the people who were finding her assembly so amusing wished to leave the hall then they were welcome to do so! I just couldn't bring myself to raise my hand and say "Mrs Gummidge - I am afraid that it is my fault! You see I let out a fart that was like a trumpet blast - must have something to do with the leftover curry my wife brought back from her work night out last evening!"

Farting - we all do it and yet throughout the ages this natural activity has caused embarrassment, laughter, shame, annoyance, punishment, false accusation, over-dramatisation, scrunched up facial expressions. What I say is this - Let the farting continue! Kate Moss, The Queen, Hillary Clinton and The Archbishop of Canterbury - they all fart like the rest of us... WAS THAT YOU?

Pig

This little piggy went to market and this little piggy stayed at home. This little piggy had roast beef and this little piggy had none. And this little piggy, this little piggy went down the muddy field and spent forever grunting and snouting around in the muck, looking for acorns. Watch him, he never stops - greedy pig!

Porky Pig - acorn hunter.

Today

On this day back in 1564, William Shakespeare was baptized in Stratford-upon-Avon. It was also the day, in 1894, when Rudolf Hess was born and in 1976, it was the day on which the British/South African* "Carry On" comedian Sid James died (notice the capital abuse on the front cover of his biography!). In 1999, British TV presenter Jill Dando was murdered on this very day and in 1956 it was the day on which the world's very first container ship left New Jersey for Houston, Texas. April 26th - an unexceptional day in human history. I wonder what today will hold for all of us. Will it be an unspectacular working day soon to be forgotten or will it be one of those days that get etched in your memory forever? As they say in certain American eating establishments - "Have a nice day!" or as they say in certain English pubs at closing time - "Sup up and piss off home!" What rhymes with April the twenty sixth?

* Thanks to Mutterings and Meanderings for pointing this out. I had always thought he was half Australian. Quick research tells me he was born, wait for it, on Hancock Street in Johannesburg! And that's true.

Blossom

Spring blossom doesn't last for long. A gust of wind and then it's like there's been a wedding with natural pink and white confetti blowing all over the place. But for a short while - five or six days - the trees that blossom are festooned, bedecked, garlanded with tender little flowers. Such a small window of opportunity for pollination.

I particularly love this time of year when the Earth is not just reawakening, it is already coming down the staircase. New growth is everywhere. Leaves are fresh and untainted. Insect numbers are only just starting to increase. There's grass to be cut, edges to be strimmed and hedges to clip.

It's been so dry here recently. Last night after Shirley and I had been down the pub, I was up the garden with my box of matches like a drunken pyromaniac. Last autumn, I had pruned a couple of trees and carefully stacked up the branches and twigs for a night like last night - a crescent moon sinking over the rooftops and just a hint of breeze.

The bonfire crackled as little golden tongues of flame sought to ignite old branches, then "whoosh!" a great mother of a multicoloured flame rose maybe twenty feet above the peak of the bonfire structure, twisting and roaring. I watched the show from an abandoned plastic garden chair, suckling on a bottle of Italian lager. Burning leaves, lifted from the inferno made delicate snaking necklace shapes in the night sky.

Saturday night in Springtime - good to be alive - taking as much sleep as I wish without a clock nagging me to hurry on. Then today, Sunday, I went out hunting for a new barbecue because the other one finally succumbed to rust and metal fatigue. Found a new one at "Tesco". It was flat-packed. Putting it together really required four hands but I only have two. It was flopping about and the instructions had certain deliberate omissions just to make your blood boil but after one hour & forty minutes I had finally mastered the beast... ready for the sultry summer evenings that global warming promises.

HP

So HP Sauce is no longer being made in the UK.

Should the bottle still sport an image of the Houses of Parliament if the product is no longer British? Answers on a postcard or back of a sealed down envelope to the usual competition address.

Glorification

I think that the immediate release by NBC of Cho Seung-hui's "media package" is utterly sick and reprehensible. In his very troubled mind, it seems that Cho Seung-hui sought notoriety - to go down in legend. NBC have effectively given the bastard what he wanted and out there in the back woods and the ghettos of America and beyond there will be unwholesome, twisted young people just lapping it up. Seeds will be sown in warped minds. But this isn't "Rambo" or "Nightmare on Elm Street" - this is real life and those poor victims at Virginia Tech will never see another sunrise.

My heart also goes out to the families and friends left behind. Surely, NBC should have respected their grieving instead of inflaming it with Cho Seung-hui's wicked and self-obsessed media gift. In many ways, it would have been better to simply destroy the package, instead of letting the whole world unwrap it only 48 hours after the horror happened.

I thought the lad was studying English Literature - so how come he produces this rambling comic book drivel...?:-

"You have vandalized my heart, raped my soul and torched my conscience. You thought it was one pathetic boy's life you were extinguishing. Thanks to you, I die like Jesus Christ, to inspire generations of the weak and the defenceless people.

Do you know what it feels to be spit on your face and to have trash shoved down your throat? Do you know what it feels like to dig your own grave? Do you know what it feels like to have your throat slashed from ear to ear? Do you know what it feels like to be torched alive? Do you know what it feels like to be humiliated and be impaled on a cross and left to bleed to death for your amusement? "

What a load of crap!

Yahoo new themes for your mails

Most of you may have registered for Yahoo Mail.


But seems to me that you are bored with that old damn blue colour messing up with your screen.


But dont worry Yahoo's not sleeping


You can now change your default blue with those shown under:





So what are you waiting for...
Click on..
http://in.f361.mail.yahoo.com/ym/themes?.done=http://in.f361.mail.yahoo.com/ym/options&.rand=131540374

Awful

Music played, and people sang
Just for me, the church bells rang.

Now he's gone, I don't know why
And till this day, sometimes I cry
He didn't even say goodbye
He didn't take the time to lie.

Bang bang, he shot me down
Bang bang, I hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, my baby shot me down...

Cho Seung-hui, aged 23 died at Virginia Tech yesterday morning. He was a South Korean - a guest in the USA - pursuing a degree course in English. What was going on his head? To wantonly cut short so many lives without good reason - it beggars belief. So once again, as an unashamed Americophile, I find myself mourning the wasted lives of mostly young Americans in the land of the brave and the free where lunatics like Cho Seung-hui can all too easily get hold of lethal weapons. Sing it with tears in your eyes for the lost thirty two...

No refuge could save the hireling and slave

From the terror of flight, or the gloom of the grave,

And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave

O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

Capitals

Madame at "Mutterings & Meanderings" recently ranted about inaccurate grammar. Today, as I watched Hull City grind out a 1-1 draw with Colchester United, I noticed one of the rotating advertising bars at the side of the pitch. It was for a local building firm - "Stubb's Bro's"! Well if the Stubbs brothers can't get their apostrophes right, how could I possibly trust them with any bricklaying? They'd forget to put cement in their mortar!

But it's not apostrophes I wish to rant about this evening, it is the widespread and deliberate disavowal of rules surrounding the use of capital letters. Many companies, film makers, TV programme makers, sign makers and advertising agencies seem to think that it is somehow cool and rather jolly and stylish to forget about capitals... - Hey look at us, we are thoroughly modern - we don't need yer damned capitals dude! - Tossers! Try embedding rules about capital letters with texting teenagers in a written word environment that daily evidences abuse of the very rules you are trying to convey.

For all those "cool", fashionable, hip advertising executives and book jacket designers who seek to arrogantly re-invent long-established rules of English grammar, I give you the instances when capital letters should be used:-

the first word of a sentence or fragment
the name of a day or a month
the name of a language
a word expressing a connection with a place
the name of a nationality or an ethnic group
a proper name
the name of a historical period
the name of a holiday
a significant religious term
the first word, and each significant word, of a title
the first word of a direct quotation which is a sentence
a brand name
a Roman numeral
the pronoun I

reading the news about sunni suicide bombers in baghdad and basra in iraq, i have decided to create a crack team of capital protection stormtroopers. our mission will be to blow up any companies or individuals found guilty of deliberate capital letter abuse! anybody out there in blogworld wish to join the c.l.p.s? Of course, people who are either ignorant or word blind and make unwitting mistakes with capitals will be excused from these revenge attacks!

"the scandal of scientology"? Don't you mean "The Scandal of Disregarding Simple Rules about the Use of Capital Letters"?

Game Review:Bully

If you are a teen ager you must have heard of this game.
BULLY
the first ever game to show school life, real school life.
I am not having PS2 but that doesnt means i cant play at some video gaming parlor for 10INR for half hour.(cut this crap-m gettin' personal)

This game features nerds to bullies and you are a bully named Jimmy Hopkins bullying in the Bullsworth Academy.
Easy and fun missions to reduce stress given by the real school of yours.
Based on San-Andreas engine this game offers freedom although less than GTA but sufficient for a virtual school.
You can beat students(includes all types),teachers,prefects but teachers and prefects dont leave you and its guaranteed you'll be caught in few seconds.Even breaking laws out of the school can arrest you.
Detentions are bad and you have to tackle them for messing up with the teachers.
You can have gf's too.
Overall this game is for those who want to live the school.
Must-play!

Blogger's not resting

Ya its true when google's not resting then how its son can.
Recently blogger launched two new page elements you wish to add.
These are Newsreeel and VideoBar

I have added newsreel which you can see below the top ad.
Newsreel lets us add google news stuff
and Video Bar few videos (sorry i didnt add this because it was killing me...and will kill many dial-up users)
In both of them you can add specific keywords.
Well keeep up Bloggy!

Back

Berber merchant.

Last night in the famous Djamaa El Fna Square in Marrakech, I saw a blind man hobbling towards me with a long white stick. He was happy and already communicating with his friends who were sitting on a bench. They hunched up to let him sit. And there they were - four middle-aged blind men together with their begging bowls. United in their sightlessness. Nearby there were stalls that sold only boiled snails and stalls that only sold spices. There were orange juice traders and peanut men. Women in veils pulled at my sleeve and a turbaned man with a monkey on a chain wanted photograph money. Beyond them in the drumbeat darkness, circles of Moroccan men watched clowns, storytellers and musicians. Bizarrely there was a fishing game with rods where you had to hook bottles of Coca Cola. Henna tattoos were readily available along with immediate dentistry, tarot readings and the opportunity to buy animal bones and single cigarettes. And beyond this there were the "souks" - crammed market lanes where tiny shops were packed to the rafters with slippers, pottery, dyed cloths, scarves, lemons in brine, carved camels, carpets, bunches of fresh mint, lampshades, Berber and Tuareg antiques and... heaven knows what else. It was utterly mind boggling.

Essaouira

We spent the first four nights at the coastal resort of Essaouira - such a lovely place. Fishermen in blue boats, camels faraway up the beach, seagulls squawking, a maze of alleyways, the minaret of the Grand Mosque, the souks, the eighteenth century cannons staring out to the Atlantic from ancient ramparts. It was a place of dreams. Here Orson Welles shot much of "Othello" in the nineteen fifties. We stayed in the same hotel - "Hotel Des Iles" - also favoured by Winston Churchill and the present King of Morocco - Mohammed VI.

Fruit seller in the Marrakech souks.

I could write so much about the past week - so many images, so many surprises. It was just what Shirley and I were looking for - somewhere different. The traffic in Marrakech was absolutely crazy. Dropping names I saw Damon Albarn, formerly of the band Blur, buying herbs in the souks and I also saw a leading British politician - David Willetts - in the passport queue at the airport. Strangely, neither of them saw or recognised me! Hope you like my five selected photos.

Sunset over Djamaa El Fna

Wanna destroy the world with NetDisaster

Recently i syrfed thrugh this amazing site or you can say site spoiler.
The website is NetDisaster-Destroy the world
If you hate any site,want to throw your anger over it, this site is just for you.
You can do whatever you want almost whatever you want their animations to do.
Even pee on your enemy site.

Orkut on polling + Crazy Codes

Google's gearing up crating stuff.
Adding stuff...
and it has done that to orkut too.
It has added the facility of creating polls(good for social networking sites) in communities.

Crazy codes for Orkut:
Want to watch your friends photos spin around...
Just paste this code in your scrapbook's address bar:

javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI=document.images; DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i

Want to see a colourful orkut page...
Just paste this code like the previous one

Copy the following text and paste it in your address bar javascript: i=0;c=["red","green","blue","yellow","magenta","orange","black","white"]; a=document.links;setInterval('i++;a[i % document.links.length].style.color=c[i % c.length]',10);void(0);


ENJOY ORKUTTING!

2 damn' crazy sites

I have got 2 crazy websites for you.
As i have been through them i want you also to taste them (HUMAN NATURE)
So tight up your seat and belts...
and try these one hell of sites:-
Experience the best ever maze game...
http://fun.drno.de/flash/games/lab.swf

Bored?Get Relaxed...Click below...
http://home.comcast.net/~wolfand/

So get ready to dip in...
you wont die

Cricket and Technology: Dartfish

Back again with a cricket innovation: Dartfish
Dartfish is avery useful tool that allows a complete breakdown analysis of the player's action,ball trajectory and so on.The software uses digital video graphics to deliver instant visual feedback without disrupting the flow of match.It includes video analysis tools like SimulCam and StroMotion that enables the players as well as the coaches to make powerful technical,tactical and stastical analysis.
Simulcam composites two video sequences of live or archieved clips to illustrate at each and speed of the different players into a single integrated video sequence.StroMotion allows viewers to see live action unfold before their eyes in time and space by breaking the video images into a frame by frame sequence. The StroMotion technology is its ability to select certain images and break them into a series,thus editing the unnecessary images .

Out on a Limb

Ok gonna go out on a limb here.

Watched Casino Royale over the weekend and I have to say I was underwelmed.

Accepted it's meant to be reboot of the franchaise and yeah Daniel Craig was an interesting, perhaps inspired choice for the lead. But where was the humour to temper the violence of some scenes? However it's great to see Bond getting beaten and the scars lasting beyond one scene instead of using some sort of Star Trek style reset.
You either love or loathe the fabulous gadgets from Q Branch. They were all gone in favour of running around, more fights and double crossing. I miss those gadgets- was there not even room for a pen that turns into a one-shot death ray LOL? Sure he had a tracking devise that enabled the backroom boys in London to monitor the hero but this was meant to be James Bond and I expected more. This looked more like any number of competent Hollywood produced action-adventure spy movies and not Britain's most loved spy.
On another note. Doctor Who returned to our screens this weekend. Wow- that was only the first episode! Can it get any better?

Cricket and technology: Hawk-eye

Another cricket innovation...the most useful and the most used...Hawk-eye Created by Paul Hawkins.This technological innovation uses sophesticated image processing techniques to track the trajectory of the ball once it has left the bowlers hand with the help of series of cameras placed all around the cricket stadium.In addition to resolving LBW decisions given by the umpire,it helps to accurately compare bowler's speed,line and length.Hawk-eye is used extensively by a lot of teams in cricket today due to its ease of use and also because it is visually appealing.However cricket is not the only sport where Hawk-eye is being used;it is equally popular in tennis where it helps to resolve controversial line-calls.It is also developing a system for the American baseball league for accurately tracking the flight of the bowler's pitches by using four to six dedicated cameras.

PREVIEW:

Hawk-eye gives a ball-by-ball analysis of the over-bowled

Today's matches:

vs
Bangladesh vs New Zealand

Get your hands dirty with Google's TiSP

Google is back again with something unbelievable unthought...Google TiSP
What the hell it is?
Google TiSP is a fully functional, end-to-end system that provides in-home wireless access by connecting your(get your hands dirty) commode-based TiSP wireless router to one of thousands of TiSP Access Nodes via fiber-optic cable strung through your local municipal sewage lines.
To attract you Google says:-
It is:
Free, fast and highly reliable
Easy to install -- takes just minutes
Vacuum-sealed to prevent water damage

Whatever it is if you are trying to be plumber,can stuff your head in your commode,can stop shitting for your connection.
Try it... its only for you