7 years ago

While looking under my bed today for a lost sock, I found a box of old diaries. I opened one of them right on a page that was written exactly seven years ago. It was my last night at home before I left for New York. I didn't know that it would be the last time my parent's house ever really felt like home, and that I wasn't just going off to college, I was going off to the next part of my life and the person I would become. I didn't know how hard that first year in college would be, and how well I would get to know loneliness and longing.

August 24th, 2003

Hi Beth, (I name my diaries)

Well, yesterday I went to Ibiza (a club in Sao Paulo) with G* and I got drunk and I kissed F* and then today I had a hang-over, and so last night was fun and not that fun at the same time. Tonight is my "last" night, tomorrow I'm off to college, wow. We just had dinner at the Outback. I'm not ready to leave Sa yet Beth. And my room.... so much... But I'm excited about college. Real excited! I'm nervous about having roommates and all that. I also talked to B* today. He's so nice. And he likes me a lot Beth. And J* wrote me an email. But I'm still into T*, who's stopped emailing me, and dealing with the end of things with R*, who's still contacting me every day. How confusing. And my friends are still kind of mad at me and siding with R*, which is messed up. I can't wait to leave it all behind. Will there be any boys at Sarah Lawrence? Like, datable boys? I'm so in love with my tattoo. I can't believe I got a tattoo. I'm glad I have a tattoo as I go to college. I'm currently obsessed with Cyndi Lauper and American Dreams. I miss Spain. Europe was so fun. Well, I'm tired and I wanna sleep a lot... Good bye Brasil, college here I come!

Good night,

La

Throughout the next couple of years, I would find datable boys at Sarah Lawrence, I would forget about most of the boys mentioned, I would get three more tattoos, I would stop watching television, I would miss home terribly, I would make many new friends, I would miss my old friends, I would drink a lot, I would travel to Europe a few more times, and I would make New York my home.

Me, in college, with my long hair dyed orange at the tips, writing poetry on the grass.