Servants

Thuza - allocated to Jan (Cosumne Gal)

In Blogland, our agents are beginning to recruit servants in preparation for the first influx of bloggers next year. Mostly they are Mergui islanders. Obviously, there will be several general servants who will be engaged in basic maintenance tasks such as clearing the bush, meeting boats at the new jetty in Keith Bay, shinning up coconut palms to gather fresh nuts and running the national laundry.

However, in addition to the general servants, residents will be entitled to their own personal servant allocation. Mostly these servants will reside beneath the cabins and chalets that are currently under construction. Personally, I shall not require my own servant as I plan to be self-sufficient but I guess some bloggers will require support. Here's a list of typical tasks that servants may perform:

• Cooking
• Cleaning
• Fishing
• Massage
• Bed Making
• Fanning
• Driving golf buggy
• Re-thatching roofs
• Washing Up
• Cutting toenails
• Bowling cricket balls
• Application of sun protection cream and after-sun cream
• Emptying commodes
• Annihilation of spiders, rodents and stinging insects
• Campfire song and dance

Residents in waiting need to state their servant requirements - age, male or female, and number. Note that no resident will be allowed more than three servants and all servants must be treated with the utmost kindness, respect and good humour. They may be servants but they are still our equals.

Nanda - allocated to Ian - Shooting Parrots