Release. Soften. Let Go.

Yoga today was about releasing the shoulders. I carry a truck-load of tension on my shoulders; every time I roll them back I crack monstrously. In the winter, it's like my shoulders think I'll be less cold if they're closer to my ears. In short, these muscles are tight, and they hurt.

Releasing, relaxing, softening, and letting go sounds absolutely fantastic to someone who has so much crap stored in there.

Here's how I feel post-75-minutes of shoulder releasing:

Angry.

Vulnerable.

Sexy.

Wider.

Taller.

Sad.

Anxious.

Breasty.

Loose.

Drunk.

Young.

Open.

...

Here are some thoughts I'm having: 

I need a glass of wine. 

It's colder than it was before. Maybe tension does make it less cold...


I feel like crying.


My boobs look huge. Awesome!


I can really feel my shirt on my back.


I want a warm bath.


Why didn't anyone invite me out tonight? I'm lonely.


I'm so beautiful.


I'm so healthy!


I need a gentler bra.

I wish I had someone to cuddle with.


I hate show-off yogis. 


Why don't I live near nature?


...

I know tension protects me. It probably saves my life sometimes in this city. But I always wish I could relax, soften, and not feel such pain on my neck and shoulders all the time because I scrunch them up all day. So it was a real gift to dedicate 75 minutes of my day (of my week, of my life...) to letting go. I highly recommend it. I hope I remember this sensation tomorrow. And maybe the day after, too.